Shouldn’t women be having speculum orgasms?

Sexual woman in bed

Debra Pascali-Bonaro and Christiane Northrup, inquiring minds want to know:

If, as you claim, women have orgasms at the moment of birth, shouldn’t they be having orgasms during speculum exams?

As Dr. Northrup explained:

“When the baby’s coming down the birth canal, remember, it’s going through the exact same positions as something going in, the penis going into the vagina, to cause an orgasm.

Right, and when a speculum is inserted in the vagina (and again when it is removed), it is going through the exact same positions as the penis going into the vagina. So why don’t women have speculum orgasms?

Could it be because you can’t profit from the idea?

Most people (myself included) dismiss orgasmic birth as a lucrative figment of your imaginations, complete with the hucksterism attendant on all form of quackery. And certainly, Pascali-Bonaro’s website Orgasmic Birth does nothing to disabuse them. You can’t even get to the home page without being barraged with a plea for your email address:

You deserve to give birth with Dignity, Love and Pleasure! Learn how to move from Pain to Power. Subscribe now to receive my Pleasurable Birth Tips PDF & Free Weekly “Keys to Unlock Your Pleasure” enews!

[pullquote align=”right” color=”#af937b”]If women women can have birth orgasms, shouldn’t they be having speculum orgasms too?[/pullquote]

According to you, orgasmic birth is the best kept secret. Indeed, it’s so secret that it has only been described in Western, white, well off women who have read the natural childbirth literature within the past 40 years. It is so secret that it apparently never happened before then in all of recorded human history, and so secret that it never happened among African and Asian women. And it is so secret that for all of recorded human history childbirth was routinely described as excruciating and agonizing.

Who knows the secret? Ina May Gaskin, of course.

In the film, world-renowned midwife Ina May Gaskin helps us to understand the normal rhythms of labor and women’s ability to have ecstatic birthing experiences…

Women can experience birth as sensual and pleasurable, and can enter a natural state of ecstasy. New research shows that the intimate experience of birth affects a woman’s life profoundly. Babies are also affected emotionally and physically, and over the long term, by their birth experience.

Gaskin is the lay midwife who wrote this:

Sometimes touching her very gently on or around her button (clitoris) will enable her to relax even more. I keep both hands there and busy all the time while crowning … doing whatever seems most necessary.

And this:

Sometimes I see that a husband is afraid to touch his wife’s tits because of the midwife’s presence, so I touch them, get in there and squeeze them, talk about how nice they are, and make him welcome.

As well as this:

I might want to have a cunt one day and a twat the next. On the third day I might decide that pussy is my favorite word.

These quotes, taken from the 3rd and 4th editions of Gaskin’s book Spiritual Midwifery, sound immature, foul mouthed, and sexually inappropriate.

What is the purported key to having an orgasmic birth?

The key to having an orgasmic birth is spending money on lay midwives like Gaskin and their natural childbirth associates.

What a coincidence!! Who could have seen that coming?

But if birth has been described, in every time, place and culture as excruciating and agonizing, how could any woman possibly have an orgasm at the moment of birth, when the vaginal opening is being stretched to 10 times its resting size, often tearing as a result?

Pascali-Bonaro is graciously willing to talk by phone to you or me for the low, low price of $195 an hour.

Or, if you book before July 31, you can join Pascali-Bonaro at her woman’s retreat on Italy’s Amalfi Coast from August 30th to September 6th ($3500 if you book after July 31).

But I prefer to ask Pascali-Bonaro and Northrup publicly:

If women women can, as you claim, have birth orgasms, shouldn’t they be having speculum orgasms too?