Mine is bigger than yours

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Over time, to my surprise, I’ve begun to feel sorry for many natural childbirth advocates.

Why?

Because they clearly suffer from a pathetic lack of self-esteem, so pathetic that they cling desperately to any opportunity to feel superior to other women, even if they had no control over the issue in question.

I would feel sorry for any woman who bragged that she was superior because her nose was larger than that of other women. I would feel sorry for any woman who set up a website boasting about the size of her feet. And I do feel sorry for women who feel that their greatest “achievement” is their large breasts.

Therefore, I feel very sorry indeed for the women of the Big Baby Project. Apparently they are so desperate for some sense of self worth that they have set up a website dedicated to their internal pelvic dimensions.

The purpose of the website, according to the woman who created it:

This is a collection of stories. The stories are about Mamas who vaginally birthed babies that some people may consider to be big. People need to hear and see these stories, I hope you share it far and wide, and participate if possible.

The real purpose of the website? To scavenge for praise for the “achievement” of having a pelvis large enough to accommodate an obese baby.

The technical term for a very large baby is macrosomia. Macrosomia is no more worthy of praise than a 45 pound 3 year old or a 10 year old who wears size 14 sneakers, but that doesn’t stop psychologically needy women from bragging about it.

Not all macrosomic babies are obese. Some families simply grow large babies and macrosomia is known to be more common among those of Hispanic descent. However, a substantial proportion of fetal macrosomia is due to untreated or poorly treated diabetes, excessive maternal weight gain, or maternal obesity, which can double or triple the risk of macrosomia. In other words, women have no control over the size of their babies beyond the ability to render them obese through poorly controlled diabetes of excessive maternal consumption.

You will notice that the website refuses to accept pictures of macrosomic babies who were born by C-section, only those born vaginally.

Why?

Because these pathetic women are anxious that you should admire them for their pelvic dimensions, yet another characteristic over which they have no control yet want to take credit.

Just like there is tremendous variation in maternal stature, there is tremendous variation in the dimensions of women’s pelves. As this illustration demonstrates, there are four main “shapes” of the female pelvis.

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The most common female pelvic shape, and the one best suited to accommodate a baby, is the gynecoid pelvis. Size variations within a specific shape can make a significant difference in the size of the baby that can pass through.

So the women who post on the site are bragging about the size of their baby and the shape and size of their pelvis, as they have control over either one, and as if you should be impressed with either one. In that sense, it is no different than boasting that you have a bigger nose than other women, or bigger breasts. It is the same old tiresome effort of women to judge each other by physical characteristics, with one important exception.

Macrosomia is a risk factor for various childbirth complications, including neonatal injury, neonatal death and maternal injury. The most dreaded complication is shoulder dystocia. That’s what happens when the baby head fits through the pelvis, but the shoulder become stuck. This is a life threatening emergency because the umbilical cord is compressed by being trapped between the baby’s body and the walls of the pelvis, thereby cutting off oxygen to the baby. The baby will die if not delivered in a timely fashion. Death is the worst possible outcome, but babies who survive are also at risk for serious injury to the nerves of the arm, which can be stretched as they pass through the neck. If the nerves are injured during birth, the baby may suffer permanent paralysis of the arm.

This can cause lifelong difficulties for the child as illustrated in a charming series of books produced by the Erbs’s Palsy Group:

Herbie and his special arm

As far as I can determine, The Big Baby Project makes no mention of whether any of the featured babies suffers from Erb’s palsy or whether any of the mothers had long term problems (tears, incontinence) from delivering a big baby. And of course, there are no dead babies on the site, because, apparently, women aren’t entitled to “hear and see” those stories.

It’s really rather pitiful when you think about. A group of women is so desperate for attention and validation that they post to a website bragging about the size of their baby and the size of their pelvis, as if they had anything to do with either. You really have to be pathetically needy to boast about that.