Jan Tritten’s Birth Page: to the frontier of homebirth idiocy and beyond!

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If you are searching for evidence of the ignorance and incompetence of homebirth midwives and homebirth advocates, you really can’t beat Jan Tritten’s Birth Page on Facebook.

Jan’s done some editing on the page lately, what with the scandal surrounding her decision to crowd source a life and death situation on her personal Facebook page in real time while the baby was dying. Jan has removed recent posts, but for some unfathomable reason has left  the older evidence of her mind boggling ignorance.

Here’s a few examples good for laughs or expressions of horror, or both.

1. First we have this:

Trittens birth page 1

Jan writes (on behalf of another homebirth midwife):

A mother is asking any advice on how to turn a transverse lie at 37 weeks? It is her second pregnancy and baby has been transverse from week 20. Her first babies, twins were cesarean, because breech. Any tips greatly appreciated, since she would like to skip the c-cection this time.

Almost all the “tips” are unspeakably stupid, but the winner is Tara:

I’d also explore any fear issues and Let them go. My midwife on my last pregnancy explored with me at around that stage why my daughter kept turning breech despite spinning babies etc. She told me baba often moves closer to mamas heart when s/he knows mama is upset/afraid. Realising this helped me release any stress & fear and I chatted with my unborn that night to reassure her and tell her I was fine and she could move into position – which she duly did during the night and we went on to have an incredibly beautiful homebirth. good luck mama x

The baby senses her mother’s fear and moves closer to her heart. Really, Tara? By turning right side up, she is no closer to her mother’s heart than she was before. What is being closer to her heart do for either baby or mother? And, Tara, do you really believe that a mother’s emotions are in her heart as opposed to her brain? If so, where are they located, the atria or the ventricles?

2. In this one, Jan proves she is ecumenical in her ignorance. She knows nothing about midwifery, and she knows nothing about animal husbandry, either:

Trittens birth page 2

Jan generously shares these nuggets of stupidity:

… [O]ur practices of taking baby from mother, having cold birth room etc cause hemorrhages…

Cord and membranes actually have more hemorrhage stemming hormones and work great if placenta isn’t out…

I have said before cats and dogs don’t die of hemorrhage!

3. This is the worst one of them all, but not because of the stupidity, but because of the egotism, unwillingness to take responsibility for mistakes and the apparent refusal to learn, or even try to learn, from tragedies.

Trittens birth page 3

A midwife asks:

..How does a midwife move on with confidence and trust in her skill when there is a negative outcome either due to an omission or commission on her part? What can a midwife do to heal her own heart? (my emphasis)

Tritten replies:

…Forgive yourself is a good starting point.

No, forgiving yourself is NOT a good starting point. A baby is injured or dead and the place to start is to get down on your knees and beg forgiveness to the people whose lives you have busted into a million pieces, the parents.

The next step is an investigation into what mistakes you made and why.

The third step is intensive education and practice in handling similar situations in the future so no other baby will be injured or die as a result of your ignorance or lack of training.

Forgiving yourself is not on the list, because you don’t deserve to be forgiven.

If a baby was injured or died because you didn’t understand what was happening, or you didn’t know what to do, or you pretended everything was fine and hoped the problem would fix itself, you are RESPONSIBLE for a baby’s injury or death. You should never forgive yourself because what you have done is unforgivable.

You should NEVER forget.

And you should do everything in your power to make sure that such a tragedy never happens again!