The Feminist Breeder is so not judging you for failing to breastfeed

Full of fools

Gina Crosly-Corcoran is confused:

I am brave (foolish) enough to admit that while I totally and completely support any woman’s right and choice to feed her babies however she needs to, I still, deep down in a place I don’t like to admit, don’t really “get” it when a woman chooses, without any medical or social barrier, not to breastfeed. To me it’s sorta like deciding not to take prenatal vitamins because you just don’t wanna, without recognizing that they do help build a healthier baby. I will NOT be all sanctimonious about it, I’m just saying I’m human and that one’s a head scratcher for me. We have lactating boobs for a reason: to feed the babies we make.

Kind of like:

I am brave (foolish) enough to admit that while I totally and completely support transgender people, I still, deep down in a place I don’t like to admit, don’t really “get” when a man or a woman chooses to be the opposite sex. To me it’s sorta like deciding not to get married because you just don’t wanna, without recognizing that heterosexual families are what nature intended. I will NOT be all sanctimonious about it, I’m just saying I’m human and that one’s a head scratcher for me. A man has a penis for a reason, and a woman has a vagina for a reason: to be the gender that they were born to be.

See! Not sanctimonious or judgmental at all!

130 Responses to “The Feminist Breeder is so not judging you for failing to breastfeed”

  1. sdsures
    January 18, 2015 at 7:42 pm #

    OT: French women least tolerant to breastfeeding in public.

  2. Lily
    January 14, 2015 at 7:03 pm #

    Men have nipples for.. !?

    • sdsures
      January 18, 2015 at 7:41 pm #

      Evolution: we all start out as girls in the womb, then we are differentiated by our genes.

  3. Puffin
    January 13, 2015 at 3:34 pm #

    Anyone who calls herself a feminist and then turns around and makes passive-aggressive jibes about what a woman does or does not choose to do with any part of her body loses any right to call herself a feminist. This goes for breastfeeding and birth as well as everything else outside of that realm too.

  4. Staceyjw
    January 13, 2015 at 2:18 pm #

    TFB is a jerk, but I don’t get the example.

    Biological sex is not the same thing as gender. Sex is a physical reality, while gender is socially created, and not innate. People conflate the two, but they are not the same.
    You DO get to choose whether or not you conform to the gender role society has assigned to your sex; women can like math and pants, men can like dresses and nurturing, etc.
    You DON’T get to choose to your sex. You are either a male, or female (intersex people still have only X and Y’s). No amount of surgery, hormones, desire, need, can change your natal sex.

    I guess if you said that you don’t get why anyone would want to take on the gender role designated for the other sex, and that having a penis means you must be masculine, having a vagina means you were meant to be feminine, I would get it. the way it’s written is confusing.

    Back on topic- Gina is a jerk. but I dont care if she is bewildered by my choice to FF my son just because I wanted too. her opinion means nothing, she is such an essentialist, and thus irrelevant to me.

    • Amy
      January 13, 2015 at 2:29 pm #

      I’m pretty sure Dr. Amy was using the transgender example to illustrate how stupid the argument was to begin with. I don’t think she actually “doesn’t get” the difference between sex and gender or why some people identify as transgender.

  5. January 13, 2015 at 12:48 pm #

    So do not have time for that kind of closed-mindedness….

  6. RationalOB
    January 13, 2015 at 10:17 am #

    I had twins years ago and found breast feeding to be easier than bottle feeding. Can breast feed two babies at once not so with bottles. Plus it was a great way to lose the pregnancy weight and then some!

    • Amy M
      January 13, 2015 at 10:36 am #

      That’s not true–I also have twins, and we often had it where one person was bottle feeding two at once. When they were tiny infants, we used a boppy (one baby on each side of the boppy, their heads met in the middle-top area, bottle in each hand.) When they outgrew the boppy, we’d put them in bouncy seats, and either sit between them on a footstool, or put the seats on the coffee table and sit in front of them on the couch. Again, one bottle/hand.

      We did the one-person-feeding-two-babies with bottles so my husband and I could take shifts and get some sleep at night, and also because the twins were synced in terms of when they ate and slept so they were hungry at the same time.
      I have a picture of the boppy set up, which I can’t get to now, but if you’d like I can post later when I’m home.

    • guestS
      January 13, 2015 at 10:53 am #

      Well done, I’m popping your medal into the post. Next prize is for RELEVANCE.

      • The Bofa on the Sofa
        January 13, 2015 at 10:57 am #

        Can she at least have a cookie?

        • fiftyfifty1
          January 13, 2015 at 11:02 am #

          Make that a lactation cookie.

    • Daleth
      January 13, 2015 at 10:58 am #

      The awesome thing about formula feeding twins, in my experience, is that both parents get to bond with the babies through feeding. Sure, dad could bond by bottle-feeding breast milk, but then mom has to add a few hours of pumping on top of the several hours of breastfeeding to her daily schedule… which I personally found all but impossible.

    • January 13, 2015 at 11:44 am #

      So what?

  7. no longer drinking the koolaid
    January 13, 2015 at 9:51 am #

    She also begins with the wrong premise. Prenatal vitamins have not been shown to be of any benefit in a low risk woman with a healthy pregnancy.

    • guestS
      January 13, 2015 at 11:31 am #

      Glad you said that, I’m hopeless at taking mine!!

      • Allie P
        January 13, 2015 at 12:39 pm #

        Folic acid BEFORE conception and in the first few weeks after has shown to reduce risk of spina bifida. Folic acid pills /=/ prenatal vitamins. Taking them after those first few weeks, when the spinal column has closed (or not), also up in the air. I puke mine up from about week 8-39, but I take them like clockwork beforehand. However, I know someone with a history of babies born with cleft palate issues that was on a different vitamin. can’t remember which one.

    • Nik
      January 13, 2015 at 11:58 am #

      Yeah, every single thing I read about prenatal vitamins basically said I was paying to pee them out. My own doctor was like “Meh, you’re fine not taking them” when I wanted to stop taking them because they kept making me puke.

    • Sarah
      January 13, 2015 at 12:26 pm #

      Really? The two things may mean something different in the US and the UK, but I was under the impression the folic acid in the first trimester at least would reduce spina bifida risk.

      • January 13, 2015 at 1:08 pm #

        Ideally, folic acid should be begun 3 months before conception, and there is now a recommendation to continue it after the first trimester. Women in fertility treatment are routinely prescribed it from the outset.
        Here in Israel, folic acid is given separately from prenatal vitamins.
        Assuming adequate and well-balanced maternal nutrition, most vitamins are superfluous.

        • Sarah
          January 13, 2015 at 4:00 pm #

          I take ‘healthy start’ vitamins provided by the NHS, and have done whilst TTC and throughout pregnancy. They contain folic acid and Vitamin D, the two supplements recommended in the UK for pregnant women. However, because of our latitude, our ability to get Vitamin D year round is impaired- obviously not true of either the US or Israel.

          • Young CC Prof
            January 13, 2015 at 7:15 pm #

            I wouldn’t say obviously not true in the US, especially in the northern part among people of color.

          • Sarah
            January 14, 2015 at 3:43 am #

            I was under the impression all the US except Alaska was below the relevant latitude line, but a quick google suggests it’s a bit further south than I thought. With that in mind, it would be surprising if a prenatal vitamin containing vit D showed no benefit at all to a US cohort, no?

            It’s not even just about people of colour either- I’ve been told during both pregnancies that in the UK we’re seeing increasing Vit D deficiency even amongst white people (I am very pale myself so I think the midwife was trying to impress the importance of supplementation on me). It’s more of a risk for women whose skin is darker, but none of us can assume we’ll make sufficient Vitamin D. We are of course further north than the US, but I think the point holds. With that in mind, I’d be surprised if prenatal vitamins containing Vit D would be shown to have no benefit at all, if taken by sufficiently northerly populations.

          • Young CC Prof
            January 14, 2015 at 8:52 am #

            My Vitamin D levels were checked in my routine first-trimester blood work, just like my iron levels. Vitamin D level testing is now part of many routine physical exams. Why not just supplement everybody? Because D is fat-soluble and therefore persists in the body, and the level of supplementation that one person genuinely needs might be toxic to her neighbor.

          • Bugsy
            January 15, 2015 at 5:16 pm #

            That’s an interesting point you raise. When I was trying to conceive my son, my OB put me on Vitamin D3 – I can’t remember the dosage. This was in addition to a prenatal & folic, and I’ve continued all three through breastfeeding and now that I’m trying to conceive again. Is Vitamin D poisoning a large concern?

          • Young CC Prof
            January 15, 2015 at 7:09 pm #

            No, I don’t think vitamin D overdose is a common problem. But if you take the high-dose supplement without need, you might. Also, for a laugh, search for “Gary Null gets a taste of his own medicine.”

          • Bugsy
            January 15, 2015 at 10:16 pm #

            Thanks! I’m on 1000 iu, 25 mcg once daily. Got a little worried there that the unsolicited med advice I received from my NCB friend was actually accurate:

            “The moms in my moms’ group (in other words, “The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding”) say that you can OD on vitamin D supplements, so I intentionally let myself get bad sunburns every day to combat vitamin D deficiency instead.”

          • January 14, 2015 at 1:00 am #

            Don’t be too sure — those who dress “modestly”, either for religious reasons or to avoid sunburn or the risk of skin cancer, are prone to Vitamin D deficiency here in Israel. In fact, studies here have shown surprisingly large numbers of Israeli women to have both B12 and D deficiency. Most GPs now add tests for these problems to standard blood work.

            What Israelis have high levels of is Vitamin C, with all the citrus fruit available.

    • Dr Kitty
      January 13, 2015 at 3:02 pm #

      Folic acid reduces the risk of NTD, but has to be taken before the neural tube closes (4-6weeks post LMP).

      There is evidence that women should take supplemental calcium and vitamin D in pregnancy.

      Iron supplements are useful for women at risk of anaemia.

      Vegans should definitely consider a prenatal multivitamin.

      Otherwise…eating a healthy balanced diet is probably sufficient for most people.

      • Trixie
        January 13, 2015 at 3:44 pm #

        Don’t most people get enough folic acid through supplemented foods, these days?

      • Margo nz
        January 13, 2015 at 7:33 pm #

        In NZ Iodine is also recommended in pregnancy, along with folic

      • Sue
        January 13, 2015 at 8:28 pm #

        How is it that T”F”B can accept medical science for nutrition in pregnancy, but not for labour and delivery?

  8. Amy
    January 13, 2015 at 9:47 am #

    Gina’s also now claiming that it’s a public health issue, and citing Melissa Bartick’s study to show how formula is killing babies and costing us millions.

    • Sarah
      January 13, 2015 at 10:08 am #

      More proof of the ‘foolish’ thing then.

  9. Are you nuts
    January 13, 2015 at 9:18 am #

    Taking a prenatal vitamin = 5 second commitment. Breastfeeding = 30-45 minutes every 2-3 hours around the clock for weeks. Not. The. Same.

    • Cobalt
      January 13, 2015 at 9:28 am #

      If you’re breastfeeding 7 hours a day, I hope you love it. I would be peeling out of my skin with sensory overload. And buying formula.

      • Are you nuts
        January 13, 2015 at 9:42 am #

        Didn’t love it at the time! That’s for sure!

      • Felicitasz
        January 13, 2015 at 9:50 am #

        The beginning was the same for me, too. I loved it. Meanwhile, I sooooo much understand those who hated it, would have hated it, would hate it, and maybe use(d) the obvious opportunity to do otherwise.

  10. Sarah
    January 13, 2015 at 7:13 am #

    Bit of a fail on the old not being sanctimonious there, Gina. Foolish would be about right. Taking vitamin tablets is the exact same thing as taking responsibility for entirely nourishing another human in a process that is time consuming and often painful.

  11. SporkParade
    January 13, 2015 at 5:26 am #

    You know, I would argue that choosing to breastfeed these days, when such high-quality formula is available, is actually profoundly anti-feminist. But one of the cool things about feminism is that it (ideally) also supports the freedom of women to make profoundly anti-feminist choices, such as staying at home to raise children and dressing in a sexually provocative manner.

    • Roadstergal
      January 13, 2015 at 11:18 am #

      Is dressing in a sexually provocative manner anti-feminist? 🙁 I do it every once in a while; it’s great fun, as to me, my sexuality is a very important part of my identity as a woman.

      • January 13, 2015 at 11:47 am #

        I must be a bad feminist. I wore a tight game day t shirt to work, one that showed off more cleavage than usual. I liked how I looked and felt good about myself, and I work in an extremely male dominated field, in an extremely male dominated office.

      • SporkParade
        January 13, 2015 at 12:02 pm #

        And cooking is s very important part of my identity as a woman. I also breastfeed, though that’s not part of my identity. That’s my point, that we should feel free to embrace our own decisions because they are right for us, and not try to shoehorn them into our ideology.

        • MegaMechaMeg
          January 13, 2015 at 1:10 pm #

          I became a lot happier once I decided to not give a shit if my hobbies were too girly.
          I like to sew, I like to bake, I like pretty dresses with ruffles. I enjoy putting on makeup and doing my hair I am also an engineer and a gamer and I have not shaved my legs in probably three months because I could not be bothered. These things are not mutually exclusive and have no bearing on my worth as a human being.

        • Roadstergal
          January 13, 2015 at 1:27 pm #

          But you specifically called out dressing provocatively as an anti-feminist choice – that was where I lost you?

          (I don’t consider cooking to be anti-feminist, I consider the expectation that the woman should do the cooking to be anti-feminist. The choices to cook or not are equally feminist, IMO, if they are both choices – that’s the key part.)

    • The Bofa on the Sofa
      January 13, 2015 at 11:21 am #

      You know, I would argue that choosing to breastfeed these days, when such high-quality formula is available, is actually profoundly anti-feminist.

      Feminism is not manifested in the choices we make, but the ability to choose.

    • demodocus' spouse
      January 13, 2015 at 11:24 am #

      Dad was a stay at home parent for a year or so when I was very small. Why is Mom staying home and running a small daycare (1 or 2 kids plus my sib and me) more anti-feminist than Dad doing the same thing a couple years earlier.

    • Michele
      January 13, 2015 at 11:52 am #

      Why would choosing to breastfeed be anti-feminist?

      • SporkParade
        January 13, 2015 at 11:59 am #

        Because, even under ideal circumstances, it involves quite a bit of discomfort and expense while not having any long-term benefits and nearly no short-term benefits.

        • Guestll
          January 13, 2015 at 12:01 pm #

          How does that make it an anti-feminist choice?

        • Michele
          January 13, 2015 at 12:26 pm #

          If we accept that as true, I still don’t think that those reasons makes choosing to breastfeed anti-feminist. Other than the discomfort (which is highly variable between individuals, to me ideal circumstances would imply minimal discomfort), formula feeding also involves quite a bit of expense while also not having any long-term benefits and nearly no short-term benefits. I would call infant feeding choices feminism-neutral. If there is a lack of choice, that would be anti-feminist.

        • MegaMechaMeg
          January 13, 2015 at 1:04 pm #

          I would say that the expectation that a woman breastfeed is a twitch anti-feminist, but to me that is more a factor of anybody but the woman having a say in how she uses her body. In my perfect world the expectation is that the parents will get food into the child however it makes the most sense to them and everyone else butts out unless the child’s life is in danger or they are asked for their opinion.
          In terms of feminist issues I am sticking with equal pay as my hot button issue though.

        • Amy
          January 13, 2015 at 2:35 pm #

          Which makes it about as anti-feminist as wearing high heels.

        • Trixie
          January 13, 2015 at 3:46 pm #

          I found it to be very comfortable and not expensive. And enjoyable.

    • Allie P
      January 13, 2015 at 12:41 pm #

      Choosing to breastfeed (or not) is no anti feminist. FORCING or SHAMING someone for not breastfeeding is, though.

    • Young CC Prof
      January 13, 2015 at 1:48 pm #

      Choosing to breastfeed is a choice compatible with feminism if it’s what you choose. Helping other women to breastfeed if they wish to by ensuring they have the necessary resources is feminist. But I have to say advocating for other women to choose breastfeeding is not.

  12. January 13, 2015 at 1:47 am #

    What a horrible person I am. I never took my prenatal vitamins.

    • rh1985
      January 13, 2015 at 2:43 am #

      I stopped after the first three months. The vitamins made me feel terrible, and I saw no convincing evidence the baby needed the vitamins after the first trimester. In the unlikely event I ever have another baby, I am going to try asking to just take folic acid by itself.

      • Mishimoo
        January 13, 2015 at 4:10 am #

        I felt guilty for not being able to stomach the prenatal vitamins, but my doctor told me that it was fine for me to “mix my own” – folic acid, iron + c, other b vitamins in the morning with calcium, magnesium, vitamin d, manganese in the evening, and maxolon so I could actually eat in order to get the rest. (Everyone I saw was happy with that, but obviously talk with your medical providers)

        • Dr Kitty
          January 13, 2015 at 8:59 am #

          I’m managing 5mg folic acid and a chewy calcium/vitamin D, which I knock back with my cyclizine. I took prenatals until they started triggering my gag reflex last week. The Omega oil capsules had to go pretty much as soon as the BFP appeared.

          At the moment starchy, salty things and fruit seem to be agreeing with me- Marmite on hot buttered toast, miso soup, mango and pineapple chunks, baked potatoes and cloudy lemonade are what I’ve been mostly eating.
          I know I need to up my iron, but at present I don’t think I could keep any meat or green veg down. I’ve been taking prenatals for MONTHS, and my haemoglobin was fine during previous pregnancy, even though I didn’t take iron, so I’m hoping my built up iron stores are going to last until I can stomach a steak or some broccoli…

          • Sarah
            January 13, 2015 at 10:10 am #

            Omg yes, cloudy lemonade! I’m nearly full term now, but that stuff has so helped me get food down both pregnancies. There must be something in it that appeals to the gestating amongst us.

          • Mishimoo
            January 13, 2015 at 8:46 pm #

            Vegemite on hot buttered toast was amazing when I was pregnant, sooo yummy!

            I sympathise with the loss of the omega oil capsules – fish oil always disagrees with me, but it’s so much worse when I’m pregnant, and all of the prenatal vitamins have it. I’m currently trying high strength krill oil and it seems to be helping my joint pain without making me feel sick. (One of my gym junkie friends suggested it because its working for him – his hip is messed up from Perthes Disease.)

        • Amy M
          January 13, 2015 at 10:37 am #

          I did something like this too, since the prenatals made me puke too. I took a regular vitamin with whatever amount of folate the doctor suggested in it, and a separate iron pill, with food. I think I didn’t start the iron pill until the 2nd trimester at which point the nausea was largely gone.

      • Roadstergal
        January 13, 2015 at 11:14 am #

        I had thought the issue with folate was that it had to be taken so early in pregnancy, to be useful, that they decided to just fortify food so everyone who even just _might_ get pregnant gets enough?

      • me
        January 13, 2015 at 3:21 pm #

        I just stuck with a regular multivitamin. I didn’t find those made me sick (or constipated…. sheesh!), and they are pretty much identical to prenatals… lower on calcium, iron and folic acid, but not by a whole lot.

    • Cobalt
      January 13, 2015 at 7:46 am #

      I ate a lot of fortified cereal and juice. Prenatal vitamins gave me horrific reflux and terrible nausea. I puked a lot of them up before the little printed numbers had time to come off, no matter when, how, or what I took them with.

      • Young CC Prof
        January 13, 2015 at 8:22 am #

        Yeah, I also couldn’t stomach them. Total cereal, on the other hand, actually digested.

        • Cobalt
          January 13, 2015 at 11:09 am #

          I did Frosted Flakes and Applejacks, at least until the GD made eating sugar too mathematical to enjoy.

    • Amy
      January 13, 2015 at 2:37 pm #

      None here either. Well-balanced diet as much as I could manage it, but basically I ate whatever the heck I felt like. I placed a bit more emphasis on things like not getting drunk.

  13. Eskimo
    January 12, 2015 at 10:17 pm #

    But she’s NOT judging. Nope. That wasn’t a judgment at all.

    (She’s a moron. Anyone who hires her to work with new mothers better save up for the inevitable lawsuit)

  14. January 12, 2015 at 10:11 pm #

    Good lord she’s a nasty piece of work.

    • January 13, 2015 at 1:49 am #

      No, she’s just a dumb, insecure bunny. Can’t think why anyone pays attention to her.

      • Who?
        January 13, 2015 at 2:31 am #

        She speaks with confidence. Those who lack confidence-perhaps because they are trying to navigate a new experience with minimal support-figure that she must know what she’s doing, to be so confident. The vacuum gets filled with her nonsense, and on we go.


        • yugaya
          January 13, 2015 at 2:42 am #

          She speaks with false confidence. When you have real confidence you don’t go after click-bait approval that this type of fb announcement will instigate.

          • Who?
            January 13, 2015 at 5:09 am #

            Quite right, good call. Trouble is not everyone can see the falseness.

            Like the false hope peddled by cancer quacks.

    • Sarah
      January 13, 2015 at 7:09 am #

      I think she’s just thick, personally.

  15. junebug
    January 12, 2015 at 8:32 pm #

    The same feminist that stated if women aren’t going to breast feed they should cut their breasts off.

    • sdsures
      January 12, 2015 at 8:42 pm #


    • Kelly
      January 13, 2015 at 9:34 pm #

      I would gladly let her pay for my reduction. I don’t plan on ever breastfeeding again.

  16. KarenJJ
    January 12, 2015 at 7:54 pm #

    So she calls herself “Feminist” and struggles with the idea that women will read the same information and make different choices to what she made. Either she has to accept that other women have the freedom of choice and the intelligence to make the right decisions for their family or she should hand back her “Feminist” badge.

    • Sue
      January 13, 2015 at 8:34 pm #

      I don’t think she has a real badge, Karen. She wears a cardboard one she got from a cereal packet.

  17. Brix
    January 12, 2015 at 7:06 pm #

    Brave, huh? I don’t think that word means what you think it means. I also think you’re confused about the word “feminist”.

    • Sarah
      January 13, 2015 at 7:14 am #

      And sanctimonious too. She was right about ‘foolish’ though, I’ll give her that.

  18. rational adult
    January 12, 2015 at 6:26 pm #

    But she will NOT be all sanctimonious about it. Ha.

  19. Allie P
    January 12, 2015 at 6:07 pm #

    I have a uterus that fills up with bloody tissue every month for a reason — to make a home for a baby. So every period must be a failure. Why am I not having more babies? That what my uterus is for! I don’t “wanna?” What kind of excuse is that. This is what my body was made for. I know I can get pregnant. I know I have enough money and time to support more children. Why am I not having more? Don’t I understand what my purpose is? And what about all those ladies with working parts that have NONE? The horror!

    • sdsures
      January 12, 2015 at 8:44 pm #

      I’d better dress in black for one week a month, to give my uterine lining its proper respect in death and mourning. Only then will I be able to move on.

      • yugaya
        January 13, 2015 at 2:46 am #

        I’m sure that there is a quack somewhere on the internet charging big bucks to perform some kind of uterine lining healing/reclaiming ritual.

        • SporkParade
          January 13, 2015 at 5:17 am #

          I’m pretty sure that that’s what Judaism’s menstrual laws are. Or, as I like to phrase it, “So long period, hello again libido, let’s go get laid.” But that only costs me, like, $5 a month.

        • sdsures
          January 13, 2015 at 3:12 pm #

          We have already seen much talk in NCB circles about “healing births” after a CS. Oy.

  20. MegaMechaMeg
    January 12, 2015 at 5:39 pm #

    Here is the crazy thing. There is a lot of stuff in the world that I don’t get. I don’t get why people watch sports, I don’t understand why people wear heavy eyeliner, I don’t understand why some people say math is hard. There is a giant sphere of things completely outside my experience.
    So I shrug my shoulders, move on, and resist the urge to post about it on facebook because whether or not I get something doesn’t change its reality, and there is no rule saying that I have to understand other people’s choices in order for them to be considered legitimate.
    I personally don’t understand what moves women to breastfeed through difficulty. The reading that I have done says that the benefits are marginal and short term. Every mother friend of mine describes the process somewhere between mildly annoying and aggressively awful. My mother described nursing as one of the seven circles of hell. But most of my mom friends breastfeed. They are adult women who made a choice and even if I do not understand it, I will support them and do whatever I can to make their time with me easy. That is part of living in polite society and part of having relationships with other three dimensional human beings. Why is that so hard for this lady to understand?

    • Amy M
      January 12, 2015 at 5:45 pm #


      • MegaMechaMeg
        January 12, 2015 at 6:00 pm #

        I have, to date, made three baby slings, a custom plus sized boppy pillow, a nursing cover, a hat that looked like a boob, and a pretty dress with a nursing slit.
        I think I am doing pretty good on the support for a process that I mostly view as “huh. You do you, I guess”. 🙂

        • rational adult
          January 12, 2015 at 6:31 pm #

          Rock on! And a custom plus sized boppy would be a great gift for bottle feeding parents as well.

          • MegaMechaMeg
            January 12, 2015 at 7:04 pm #

            Oh, for sure! And I make just as many things for my formula friend, there is just only one, so the list is smaller 🙂 She mostly wants onesies with stupid things sewed on the front which is quick, fun work 🙂

          • sdsures
            January 12, 2015 at 8:45 pm #

            I saw a great maternity tee once, on ThinkGeek. It said, “Loading, please wait”.

          • Medwife
            January 12, 2015 at 11:10 pm #

            I have that shirt! And a patient of mine came in to the office shortly before Halloween, 37 or so weeks along, wearing at shirt with bloody handprints and reading “LET ME OUT” on it. Halloween seems like a fun time to be pregnant.

          • Young CC Prof
            January 12, 2015 at 11:41 pm #

            Have you ever seen the pregnant skeleton costume? That’s funny.

            I was planning to dress as a pumpkin, complete with green hat, but I still wasn’t terribly round.

          • Mishimoo
            January 12, 2015 at 11:59 pm #

            I saw that too! So when I went in to hospital for my last, I left a Facebook status with “Baby 99.99% loaded, buffering…buffering”

          • Amy M
            January 13, 2015 at 9:59 am #

            My favorite (twins-related of course) was: “Ha, ha! I LAUGH at your one baby!” I didn’t actually buy it, but it still makes me giggle.

          • sdsures
            January 13, 2015 at 2:19 pm #

            My sister has twins (4 yrs old now). I should have thought to get her a shirt like that.

    • sdsures
      January 12, 2015 at 8:45 pm #

      She has no filter. None.

    • January 12, 2015 at 10:18 pm #

      You nailed it.

    • Samantha06
      January 12, 2015 at 11:48 pm #

      I think it’s because she has absolutely no capacity to care about anyone except herself… not even her own children…

    • DiomedesV
      January 13, 2015 at 1:11 am #

      That’s interesting, because many of my mom friends have raved about how much they loved it. I FF, but that’s why when people ask me whether it’s really important (because they know I’m a scientist who cares), I always tell them that whether or not they think it is important, they should consider the possibility that they will enjoy it.

    • Cobalt
      January 13, 2015 at 9:08 am #

      I find breastfeeding to be sometimes really great (usually when passing the formula section at the grocery store without having to spend money, my budget is TIGHT), and sometimes annoying (gotta get a boob out…again…, and I’m already “touched out” and it’s only noon).

      Formula has it’s own annoyances though, no feeding is completely “pain-free”. You gotta do what works for your situation, and if you need the world to praise you for it, then it’s not actually working because you’re shifting the cost onto the rest of us.

      • MegaMechaMeg
        January 13, 2015 at 10:15 pm #

        That is the point though, right? My understanding of feeding choices doesn’t matter. For morally neutral benign choices like feeding your kid, my one single job is being a decent person and not being a dick.

        It isn’t my job to audit other peoples choices.

  21. Amy M
    January 12, 2015 at 5:38 pm #

    People have to stop telling her what their infant feeding and child raising choices are. She can judge the nebulous group of “formula feeders by choice” all she wants, but if she doesn’t know who they are and isn’t attacking them personally/directly, then who cares? She may as well be talking to a wall. Or maybe a well, since if you yell down a well, it echoes. just like her (relatively) tiny following.

  22. Sarah1035
    January 12, 2015 at 5:32 pm #

    She forgot to mention she also can’t help judging if the medical or social reasons are valid or if you tried hard enough.

  23. Mel
    January 12, 2015 at 5:31 pm #

    Well, because, like…

    See, like prenatal vitamins have actually, like proven, data to support their usefulness in decreasing birth defects. While breastfeeding benefits are totes confined to premature infants and babies in areas without safe drinking water, see.

    But I’m not judging you, either.

    • Amy M
      January 12, 2015 at 5:43 pm #

      She slipped though—she said “We have lactating boobs for a reason.” That’s a loophole—lots of women’s boobs DON’T lactate, or don’t lactate sufficiently, or maybe they lost their breasts to cancer.

      Anyway, I think we can all agree that its fine if this continues to baffle GCC for the rest of her life.

      • Allie P
        January 12, 2015 at 6:07 pm #

        oh, but that’s her “medical” free pass.

  24. Cobalt
    January 12, 2015 at 5:21 pm #

    She has her name on Twitter as VaGina. I really can’t get past that.

    • Rachele Willoughby
      January 12, 2015 at 6:04 pm #

      I thought people were just calling her that to mock her until you pointed that out. She did that to herself. I have no words.

      • Cobalt
        January 12, 2015 at 7:28 pm #

        We should all send her tampons. Organic, of course.

          • Cobalt
            January 12, 2015 at 8:59 pm #

            Wow. Total perfection in this context.

            In their intended context…I can’t even begin.

          • sdsures
            January 13, 2015 at 2:14 pm #

            It’s as though the people who want knitted tampons have no clue whatsoever of the reality of what’s involved in the maintenance of them. I mean, when I knit something that a client is going to buy, I *never* make it whilst envisioning it’s meant to be inserted into a menstruating vagina. Because SANITATION! To say nothing of the danger of TSS. I’m sorry, but my hand-knitted crafts are far more valuable.

          • Samantha06
            January 12, 2015 at 10:10 pm #

            O. M. G….

          • Dr Kitty
            January 13, 2015 at 3:28 am #

            Oh no. That is a BAD plan.
            Do not reuse porous, absorbant materials, knitted into tampons with lots of tiny holes and crevices for bacteria and yeasts to live in.
            That is a recipe for TSS and recurrent thrush.

            Silicone menstrual cups on the other hand, are safe, clean and environmentally friendly.

          • Roadstergal
            January 13, 2015 at 11:24 am #

            I want to try the cups, because I’m all eco crunchy… but tampons just do such a good job of, for lack of a better word, drying things out so I don’t get spotting in days post…

            Well, what I _really_ want to try is ablation, but my ObG doesn’t recommend it. 🙁

          • Cobalt
            January 13, 2015 at 11:46 am #

            They make ‘disposable’ cups, I think the brand is Instead. Cheap way to try it out. Quality is not near as good as the silicone ones made to last for years, but it’ll give you an idea of what it’s like.

          • Elaine
            January 13, 2015 at 12:53 pm #

            Instead is a totally different design from the mooncup/diva/etc.

          • FormerPhysicist
            January 13, 2015 at 12:49 pm #

            LOVE love love my ablation.

          • Roadstergal
            January 13, 2015 at 1:30 pm #

            Argh, I want one. But she gave me reasons why it wouldn’t be a good option for me – thin lining due to decades on hormonal BC and her experience with them not eliminating periods to the user’s satisfaction in ‘younger’ (I’d be ancient if I wanted to have a baby, but I’m apparently ‘younger’ by any other measure) women being at the top.

          • Dr Kitty
            January 13, 2015 at 3:16 pm #

            The silicone cups have two other benefits.
            1) mild suction, this anecdotally can shorten duration of bleeding.
            2) because they don’t dry things out and are very comfortable, you can use them both for days with very light flow or spotting and you can also use them the day you expect your period to start.

            I would consider investing in one.
            MeLuna have the biggest range of sizes, firmness and grip style.

          • Roadstergal
            January 14, 2015 at 9:54 am #

            You had me at ‘range of sizes.’ I’ll look into it for sure, thanks.

          • sdsures
            January 14, 2015 at 8:55 am #


          • Francesca Violi
            January 13, 2015 at 8:13 am #

            Geez… Will they really wash those bloody teabags, dry them and re-use them??! It sounds SO very un-hygienical and disgusting!

          • sdsures
            January 13, 2015 at 2:22 pm #

            I’d worry about TSS. Isn’t TSS enough of a danger with regular tampons? (The section here on Rely tampons is scary: )

  25. Sara
    January 12, 2015 at 5:12 pm #

    L. Oh. L.

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