This is your brain on pseudoscience

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  • AmandaAWenzel

    Reset your job with skepticalob Find Here

  • Cobalt

    The scrambled eggs should be whipped with breast milk and have bits of herbs and chopped placenta stuck in them.

    Might be hard to find a stock photo of that, though.

    • The Computer Ate My Nym

      Great. Now I want scrambled eggs with herbs. No breast milk though. And definitely no placenta.

  • The Computer Ate My Nym

    No oxford comma! The horror, the horror!

    • Comrade X

      I’m a big believer in the Oxford comma too. 🙂

  • Gozi

    All I ask is that you don’t judge Christianity by what you see on TBN (Trinity Broadcasting Network) …

  • SporkParade

    Physics question: Is anti-matter considered to be made of chemicals? Because BabySpork’s shampoo says right on the label that is chemical free, and now I’m wondering what on earth it could possibly be made of.

    • Guest

      It is possible to have chemicals made of antimatter, for instance look up antihydrogen, made of an antiproton and a positron, but the antimatter annihilates with ordinary matter rather quickly.

      Maybe BabySpork’s shampoo is made of dark matter. No one knows what dark matter is, but it is all natural.

    • Cobalt

      It’s made entirely of energy. Contains no matter whatsoever.

      • Roadstergal

        Einstein has something to say about that.

        • Cobalt

          He’s just a Big Physics shill.

    • Mel

      One of my sisters-in-law has a bad gluten allergy. I offered to bring snacks to game night and spent a good deal of time at our local grocery store poring over ingredient lists.

      I found one cheese that had “Pasteurized cow milk” as the first ingredient. It was emblazoned as being “gluten-free”. It also had in big, bold letters “NOT MADE WITH ANIMAL BYPRODUCTS!”

      This, of course, caused me (and my spouse and sibs-in-law) to howl with laughter.

  • fiftyfifty1

    Scrambled on teflon! Save us from doom!

    • Mishimoo

      And what chemicals are leaching from the eggflip?!

    • Mel

      Great Teflon story. A friend (it’s been over a decade now! Geez) was working as an intern to create a T-Fal knock-off product for a competitor.

      Step one: Attach electrodes to the pan.

      Final presentation at the end of the summer: Despite heroic efforts and increasingly scary chemical combinations, nothing sticks to Teflon. Including industrial strength marine glues.

  • Liz Leyden

    Do you mean “climate change denial?”

    • No. I deny that there is a climate.

      • Mel

        There’s no way to prove that climates exist. It’s all a ploy of Big Weather…..

  • That’s just what you want me to think.

    • Mishimoo

      Remember: the only safe chemicals are the ones I’m selling you! Have you thought about signing up for my pyramid…I mean team yet?

      • I’LL TAKE TEN BOXES

        • Mishimoo

          For a small amount more, you can have 20! Think of how healthy your family will be, empowered mama!!

          • OMG SO HEALTHY!

          • Who?

            If you don’t mind my saying so, I don’t think bulk discounts carry quite the right cachet. Perhaps a bonus points system so your clients get a nice little selection of trial sizes of new products occasionally as a thankyou gift for sharing their journey with you?

      • Who?

        Don’t forget to charge for postage and packing, and before long you can introduce a membership fee.

        And you’ll have to set up training for all your team (at their expense of course) and hire all your family and friends to come along and give talks and get paid to do it. They can pay you back a cut for giving them the opportunity.

        Your book will be compulsory reading for all your followers (oops, team members)-make the price reasonable, let’s not appear to get greedy here.

        Then you can sell all the special bottles and containers designed to enhance modern lifestyles, rather than the dreary containers they come in; throw in the odd ‘free’ promotional mug or tshirt or water bottle just to keep people happy.

        And remember, if anyone has any complaints, concerns or disappointments, it is all about their failure and negativity not your snake oil (oops, products). See why I hate auto-correct!

        • Mishimoo

          Don’t forget the weekly business meetings in high traffic areas for maximising your sales potential and education of the general population. Remember to dress fashion forward and drag your props (children) along in their cutest clothing.

          I do hope that you are embracing the social media platform and using it to help fulfil your goals! Are you following our pinterest boards and utilising our hashtags to their fullest potential?

          • Who?

            Look, I would, but I don’t want to 😉

            And you all must be just the right weight-not sooo skinny you are intimidating, and certainly not overweight. The fashion forward thing is tricky too, depending on the demographic you’re after: for some if you look too expensive you’ll scare them away, for others if you don’t look expensive enough they won’t think you’re doing so well they should get on your bandwagon.

            If you want to go to corporate clothing-a great leveller-can I suggest some good quality chinos and a nice poio shirt with logo for the boys, maybe similar for the girls or a nice little chambray button through? And don’t forget to update them a couple of times a year, you can get Grandma sewing and sell them to your team.

            My props are way too cynical to be any use to me in this venture, perhaps you’ll have better luck with yours!

          • Mishimoo

            Unfortunately, my props have a perchant for honesty and no compunction about sharing their opinions loudly.

            The boys uniform sounds a bit like a small company I know of which prides itself on both having God as their CEO and detoxifying your home/business environment for a reasonable fee. Of course, with their goal orientated minds, it didn’t quite compute that showing up to do a quote for a new client a day early but after business hours…carrying a long ladder, and saying “Nah, nah man. We’re here for business. We’re not burglers.” is less than convincing. No, that was definitely police harassment of their company

          • araikwao

            Nature Direct and the weird swishy water things that detoxify the air (they’re using them in lots of daycares now!)???Chemical-free cleaning products?

          • Mishimoo

            Harnessing the power of pure vacuum or negative ions for that ultraclean feeling 😉

            I was referring to neways, juice plus, and a too-small to mention (without outing myself) aircon cleaning company run by a friend of a friend. The marketing ploys have been filling up my FB feed and my pinterest feed lately. It does not surprise me to hear that someone has cracked into the daycare market – the standards of cleanliness are pretty high and so most centres would want to keep ahead of the standards where possible. If a salesperson knew that and was able to spin it right, they’d snap it up. Also, bragging rights to get parents and kids in the door.

  • Something From Nothing

    Genius